Funny Police Reports


In dealing with the law, most people tend to get very serious and even defensive. Police reports are generally recognized for their official tone but in some cases humor is unintentionally used . While sometimes the humor resides in the ingenuity of the statements made, at other times the interactions between police officers and suspects have a less than formal tone.

In life we are faced with all kinds unpredictable situations that are bound to cause a variety of different reactions. Because the norms of the society often prevent people from taking matters in their own hands when dealing with problems, many times they have to turn to police to be able to express their dissatisfaction or to get a favorable response to solve the situation they are in. Many times police reports manage to capture the human nature in a completely different way from what we might expect. Here are a few hilarious situations that were reported to the police:

A 23 year old woman made it clear that her mother in law is one of her least favorite persons after reporting her to the police. According to her statements, her mother in law entered the house without her permission. Had the story ended right there, perhaps there would have been no repercussions. However the conflict was just started to arise. After her mother in law started made insulting remarks about the odor of the house the women decided to report her to police.

The conflict between generations can be taken to a whole new level when differences in opinions strike. A conflict can even cause family members to turn against each other. Clearly unhappy about his daughter's decision to get a tattoo, a man reported to the police that she got a tattoo despite of the fact that she is younger than 18 years old.

Without a doubt, accidents cause a lot of confusion so making statements while you are in a state of shock is generally not recommended. Some of the following statements can be seen as written proofs of what being too honest or trying to make up a quick excuse for your behavior in traffic can lead to. These are a few statements that could be encountered in police reports when authors of car accidents were asked to describe what happened in their own words:

  • The pedestrian had no idea which direction to go, so I ran over him.
  • I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the roadway when I struck him
  • I had been driving my car for forty years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident.
  • Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't know.
  • In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.
  • The indirect cause of this accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.
  • I can't help it, constable. Someone has hypnotized me to park illegally!


  • Tags: funny police reports, stupid police reports, hilarious funny, funny stories, weird police reports, weird stories












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